Category: CommunityCategory: Community

Bree Stilwell tells the story about posting an idea on a local Reddit:

The idea was for an alternative local print magazine, something a bit more sideways than the long-reigning Ann Arbor Observer. The response:

‘How about contributing to the Observer? (I’m the deputy editor.)’

I’m dm’d her, she emailed me back, I sent her links to my Substack newsletter—my only published editorial work. I pitched her several ideas, we met for ice cream. We kept talking.

Yesterday, after a weekly online pilot since August, I got to see my first monthly advice column in ink, literally hot off the presses.

The audience? 53,000 direct mail recipients.

Your body of work can be expressed outside of just posting about it and hoping for the right person to see if and sweep you off your feet.

• Instagram is not the only place for your photography to exist!
• Substack is not the only place for your writing to exist!
• Your website is not the only place for your work to exist!
• Your Bandcamp page is not the only place for your music to exist!

Meet for ice cream! Get on the phone! Set up a Zoom call!

Stop waiting for people to stumble upon your magic and REACH FOR THE STARS!

Was asked “how to find community” recently, and I cited Seth Godin:

“”What can I contribute today,” might be the very best way to become part of a community. Relentless generosity brings us closer together.”

When I was a young rocker, I played the bass. Bands needed bass players, and that’s what I contributed. After many years it was evident I wasn’t going to be a rock star, so I started a music blog, writing about the bands I loved and knew from my area.

That’s what I contributed back in 2001, and I just sort of never stopped contributing. Answering questions, helping out, hosting Zoom calls, talking on the phone, whatever.

From Yancey Strickler’s post, “The internet is dying on the outside but growing on the inside.”

Hidden transcripts are drafted, revised, and designed in dark forests safe from outside view. Public channels are where dominant powers dictate and control narratives. As authoritarian regimes around the world increase their monitoring and persecution of those who do not fall in line with the dominant story, these spaces and their security become increasingly important.

This is the second time this week I’ve referenced this quote from the South Central Run Club: “Instead of broadcasting our runs and making us vulnerable to surveillance, we stopped putting it on Instagram to make people feel safer to come and hang out.”

Social media has us believe we must broadcast everything, announce our every movement. Of course they encourage this, as more posts equal more ad impressions, more “time on site.”

Rip up the script; engage outside of public view, in safe places, in supportive communities, and watch your creative orbit expand into something more real.

I donated some bikes to the CAT Bicycle Cooperative last weekend. The space was a bee-hive of activity, buzzing with volunteers and folks hanging out.

I visited a new store front in town because I’ve been talking with the owner over the years, and I bought some delicious cookies and coffee, and might be helping them set up an email announcement list.

This is just a span of a few days, and the result of IRL conversations and interactions, limited only by geography and time.

The best networking is just being a part of community. This doesn’t mean you need to join every group or sign up to volunteer every weekend, but find folks and orgs that you vibe with and say hello on occasion.

As I’ve said recently, “the more I think about Social Media Escape Club, the more I realize it’s all about the personal connections. It’s not just about the conversations, the encouragement, the support, the regular check ins, but the depth of those interactions.”

Like, I’ve been following Cody Cook-Parrott for awhile, since their posts about leaving Instagram a few years back. They were a big inspiration for me for leaning into the work I’m doing here!

So I reached out sometime in late 2024 and asked if they’d be up for a short Zoom chat about email segments, and they said yes – you can watch the video here! Also, check out their Reclaim the Archive, a fundraiser workshop for Cody’s books.

“This workshop is about reclaiming and re-animating your own archive — as an artist, writer, or small business owner.”

Rad!

So, reach out. Connect. Strike up a conversation. Send that email. As Carly Valancy says, “your future self is begging you to reach out.”

“While reaching out I found myself. I found my voice. I had the beautiful epiphany we all hope to have at some point, which is that you are responsible for your life. You are responsible for your decisions and opportunities and to a large extent, your luck. Reaching out instilled the belief in me that literally anything could happen if you connect with the right person.”

Social media wants us working alone, isolated, cut off from real support, trusting only the algorithm, buying another lottery ticket and hoping the next post get 13 likes.

Or, as Seth Godin says, we can seek out the others.

“Our best work is far more likely to happen when we have peers. You’re likely to become the average of the people you spend professional time, so choosing your cohort is best not left to chance.

There’s no map for this, no step by step guide, and that’s why it’s so important to start now.

Here are two notes from people who joined our recent calls.

I’m not saying you need to join our weekly Zoom calls (though you could), but being around other creative people really helps.

It gets you out of your own head.
It shows you that you’re not alone.
Thousands of others have the same challenges you have.

We are better together.